A Little Bit of Encouragement

Truth be told, my heart has been aching lately.  It’s been filled with such frustration about the state of education.

I feel bogged down by paperwork and grading and policies and politics.

But then.  It happens.  That one little piece of assurance.

Today, a student that I poured hours of time and effort into; who I prayed for, graduated high school.

And breathe.

She is starting college next month.  She is turning her life into a success story.

And she FaceTimed me and told me that she couldn’t have done it without me and to thank me.  In her cap and gown.  No big deal.

It meant more to me than any gift I could have received.  Those words are something I will treasure for the rest of my life.

I did something worthwhile.  If that is all my life amounts to, it is enough.  One student was helped and gave me credit for that.

I am beyond humbled by that thought.

And it is reassurance that I am doing the right thing.  I am making a difference.  I am not a terrible teacher that I seem to think I am.  I have made a difference.

My heart, full.  My soul, encouraged.  My eyes, full of tears.

Merry Christmas to me.

The Harsh Truth

I’ve been missing in action lately.  I swear I have a good reason.  It’s what this whole blog is about.

I’m a teacher.

This week is the last week until a blissful thing called winter break.

Can I tell you how excited I am???

Almost one full semester in a public school system and I have learned more than I even thought possible.  I’ve switched positions twice and now have been hired full time as a Reading teacher in a middle school.

My babies are low.  I mean low.  Phonics low.

It literally breaks my heart every time I watch them struggle with a word they should have learned years ago.  They’ve been given very little hope in their short lives.

I’ve also had some harsh reality when it comes to the politics of education.  I thought I knew before, but now I realize just how bad it actually is.  Teachers and staff that could care less about students, while others pour their hearts into their students.

The students themselves are entitled and pretty awful, but that seems to be the norm of this generation.

Let me rant about the students for a minute.  If I had ever tried some of the things they do and say, my momma would have beat my butt.  Some of these students are just plain mean and nasty.  I would love for one of my future children to try it.  They’ll learn fast that you don’t pull that kind of crap with me.

I also understand a whole new level of tired.  Maybe it’s because I’ve been teaching consistently (summers and all) since February 2014.  Or maybe it’s because I just tire easily.  I go home after work and I look around at the laundry I need to do and the dinner I need to make and just want to cry.  My apartment looks like a tornado attacked it and I just haven’t cleaned up the debris yet.  It makes me question the ability to do this as a mother.  I can barely keep up with my relationship.  How about when I have a home and children to add to that?  It is a terrifying thought.

I’m also inspired daily by my coworkers.  They are constantly coming up with new ideas to manage their classroom, teach students, and make learning fun and engaging.  This year will either make or break me.  At least I’ll have amazing people to work alongside.

MERRY CHRISTMAS YOU CRAZY TEACHERS!!!!!